Black Swan (2010): DARK & HAUNTINGLY BEAUTIFUL

Black Swan (2010)

I am completely blown away by this movie. It's been haunting me all night since I've watched it less than twelve hours ago! As the movie ended, it left me thinking, and I caught myself astonished, by all aspects of the movie; the unpredictable plot, the strong characters, & the unbelievable harshness of reality in it.

As we all know, Black Swan is directed by Darren Aronofsky, other of his movies which I know of include Pi and The Wrestler, but I only have seen The Wrestler, and I know that he's famous for his serious, dark, real, and heavy-sprinkled-dirty-themed movies and all that, which I've seen depicted in The Wrestler, as well as in this movie. Black Swan stars Natalie Portman, Vincent Cassel, Mila Kunis, Winona Ryder, and Barbara Hershey.

I'll try not to spoil most of the plot for you, but here it is.

So, there's gonna be an opening production for the new season, Black Swan, and Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel), the artistic director, holds this audition to see which dancer is perfect for the role of the Swan Queen. Nina Sayers (Natalie Portman), this sweet, fragile, 'mommy's girl', overly protected by her ex-dancer mother (Barbara Hershey) is perfect for the role of the innocent and graceful White Swan, but she finds herself incapable of portraying her twin, the artful, sensual and seductive Black Swan. Nina ultimately wins the role of the Swan Queen, and she struggles every day to be able to be less controlled and let go of herself a little to dance the Black Swan. Nina is now the star ballerina of the production, replacing veteran Beth Macintyre (Winona Ryder), who is 'let go' by the company. Meanwhile, a new ballerina, Lily (Mila Kunis), her imprecise yet gay, effortless dancing, is perfect for the role of the Black Swan. Nina senses rivalry from Lily and feels intimated by her. They form an abrupt friendship together, which then again twists into a rivalry, again erupting from the fear of being replaced by Lily. Nina gets in touch with her dark side, even dangerously deeper than she ought, alternately blending in perfectly with the Black Swan. In the end, her role as the Swan Queen is performed 'perfectly', very 'perfect' indeed. As Nina Sayers says herself, by the end of the movie, "I was perfect." Oh my God, I have this huge urge to discuss this word, 'perfect', and how important this word is in the movie, but I don't want to spoil, since it's still a rather new movie and most people have probably not seen it yet! But count on that word, 'perfect'; it has a huge meaning in the movie since the beginning, and in the end. At this point of the movie everything made perfect sense to me and I was really haunted by it till this very moment!

Natalie Portman's performance was downright flawless and amazing! Not only as portraying the sweet, fragile, yet strict Nina Sayers as a character, but also living up to it as a ballerina, the controlled, perfectionist, graceful ballerina who craves for the role of the Swan Queen, and also perfectly transcending in character to her dark side. I was personally amazed that she was able to show so much emotion and character while she was doing the ballet. I mean, I don't know much about ballet, but I think she was the perfect ballerina, so perfect in being alive in that role while dancing, truly living up the character of Nina as a ballerina. An outstanding performance indeed by Natalie Portman, and even though I haven't found out the nominees for the Oscars except for her, I'm sure she'll win it because she definitely deserves it, just as she did the Golden Globe.

Performances by others were outstanding as well, and truly living up to their characters, especially Mila Kunis. Mila Kunis -she's like that girl we all know from That 70's Show, in which I've also seen her in The Book of Eli. To star in a remarkable motion picture like Black Swan aside the 'veteran' Natalie Portman, and to escape being overshadowed by her and the rest of the cast, was a really great accomplishment and proved her quality as an actress.

I've heard that Black Swan is considered as the ballerina version of Aronofsky's The Wrestler. But Black Swan is a cleaner cut, has a more classy setting, and presented beautifully; a perfect portrayal of the ballet world. The darkness, the dirtiness, are left to be inflicted upon the characters and the dialogues. Darren Aronofsky shows a perfect direction of a movie telling the story of a ballerina that was so real, sucking us into that world, making known to us the details of their world, all the goodness and badness, the trash-talking, the two-faces, the harshness of their world, and that it's not as perfectly nice and clean as people may think it is.

I have to say, at some time the characters were too... 'dirty' for me. I mean, I personally don't like movies with a bunch of sexual content in it, and I thought the kissing scene between Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis somewhat..., I don't know, 'needless'. But hey, if you think that that and all the rest of those contents were heavily important for the strength of the story, that's fine by me. Okay, well, perhaps they are important, but still, based on my own taste I definitely would've liked it better if they minimized it a little. But anyways, I've seen The Wrestler and it's the same there. It's Aronofsky, and I know he wants to make it perfectly real as possible. Don't judge me, though.

Black Swan was certainly an original, raw, heavy-themed movie, at the same time it was heartbreaking, soul crushing, as well was dark and hauntingly beautiful. You may love it, or you may hate it; this movie is bound to definitely divide the audience into those two boxes. I absolutely don't hate it, but I'm not sure whether I love it that much either, but I can surely objectively say that it was an amazing unforgettable motion picture, showing the greatest act yet by Natalie Portman, and that it haunts me to this moment.

The Graduate (1967)

*this post contains spoilers*

I didn't know about this movie until I saw (500) Days of Summer when the narrator tells about Tom Hansen and his belief in finding true love, that it "stemmed from early exposure to sad British pop music, and a total misreading of the movie 'The Graduate'." And of course, in that movie also, we see a small clip of The Graduate, the one where Dustin Hoffman sits with the bride side by side, which Summer Finn cried to (so she wasn't his bride and that they probably must've run away together or something -turns out after watching the whole movie that was what actually happened).

Okay, so I was really curious about the movie and I was expecting a really romantic movie, and I kept wondering if it was gonna be so touching and deep that it made Summer cry. After watching the whole movie, I understood what made her cry, and I even almost cried myself, but I still don't get it with the Tom Hansen thing. (?)

So, Dustin Hoffman stars in the movie as Ben Braddock, a successful college graduate who is also nervous, awkward, and undecided, and who is seduced by the wife of his father's business partner, Mrs. Robinson (Anne Bancroft) and soon finds himself trapped into an affair with her. Eventually though, he falls in love with Mrs. Robinson's daughter, Elaine, after he gets to know her, and this is the start of a whole new problem.

I find Ben Braddock quite irritating. I mean, since the beginning of the movie, I noticed that he didn't quite have a say for himself, and that he was this really nervous, awkward, undecided, undetermined, rather dreamy sort of boy. Especially in that scene where Mrs. Robinson tries to seduce him several times, in which she always nearly succeeds and Ben always nearly escapes. Seriously, I kept wondering why it is so hard for him to be firm and say no and just go, but he has such these huge nerves and he keeps yielding and coming back each time Mrs. Robinson calls him, and I began yelling stuff to the screen angrily like, "Get out of there!" and "Idiot, just go!" Haha, I know, I was so impatient to see him get out of there. He ultimately did, but not before Mrs. Robinson exposed her naked self in front of him and offered herself to him, causing the thought to linger, until a few days later you find him reconsidering the offer and finally calling her, after experiencing dilemma about plans for the undecided future and quite a tension with his father.

So, their night together goes on and on to several nights in the months to come, until finally Elaine Robinson comes home from Berkley and Ben is forced to take her out, after previously promising to Mrs. Robinson that he won't take her daughter out. The two go out together, which didn't go well at first, but eventually the two come to understand each other, and Ben wishes to continue meeting her. Mrs. Robinson didn't like this, and she threatens to tell the whole truth to her daughter. Finally, the truth is revealed to Elaine by Ben himself, and she is outrageous, and she returns to Berkley. One would think that this is the end, but not long after, Ben goes after her, thus starting a new set of complications and dilemmas.

I started feeling for Ben the moment he falls for Elaine and decides to go after her. It was touching that he was finally resolved on something and knew what he wanted, and that was to marry her, combating all the consequences and troubles that would possibly come. Even though I thought that the feelings he had for Elaine appeared quite abrupt and quick, I couldn't question the seriousness and the intimacy he felt for her.

Of course my favorite part of the movie, that part where I felt it drilling into the insides of my heart and almost made me cry (it made my eyes all watery, though), was the part where he finally takes her away with him and they run off to nowhere, not knowing where to go next, hence how the movie ended. It was so dramatic, I mean, so crazy and dramatic, and I didn't expect it to be like that. I'm sorry for spoiling this again, but I just have to! I'm talking about the part where he arrives late at Elaine's wedding and starts to scream "Elaine! Elaine!" from the glass wall upstairs, where he runs down and escapes attacks, manages to take her hand, and literally tries to combat all of them with the Cross symbol until finally escaping the building, and locking them inside with the symbol. It was hilarious, to be honest, and I was awed, but at the same time his decision to act was driven by so deep of feeling, affection, and determination, driven by the certainty that Elaine would regret marrying the wrong man whom she didn't love, just like Mrs. Robinson to Mr. Robinson (as she told him that night), that I couldn't help but feel a deep sympathy for Ben, and Elaine too, especially when they finally got on the bus and sat in silence, quietly contemplating what just happened without regrets.

I admit in the end I really felt for Ben. He was confused and didn't know what to do, and there comes Mrs. Robinson offering her beautiful self for her, and he didn't know what else to do but to consider it. Then he meets the daughter and couldn't help from falling in love with her beautiful and considerate self, and all regret for the mistakes in the past swarms in, and there he begins fighting for what he believes in, for the first time.

Can I also say, though, in addition, that I find the expressions in this film rather..., amusing? I mean, I know, this is a 1967 movie, but still, I find some expressions rather odd and funny. I don't think I need to relate to which of the scenes though, because maybe it's only me, hehe. Okay, let's just forget about this remark.

Anyways, I think Dustin Hoffman did a hell of a job portraying Ben Braddock, as well as Anne Bancroft as the beautiful, seductive, fashionable, cool yet rather 'sassy', Mrs. Robinson, and I agree with many people who say that she dominated in her scenes.

I think this is all that comes to mind about this movie. I finally watched The Graduate that I was so curious about since (500) Days of Summer, and I'm glad. I'm not disappointed with the movie, but I can't say this is one of my favorites, because I still felt that something was lacking. Maybe this is the typical 60s movies and that's how it was back then? I don't know, I haven't seen much sixties movies and I definitely don't know how life was that time. In matters of taste though, I prefer something deeper, something... well, like I said earlier, I thought that his feelings for Elaine came up too quickly and strongly -I know that one of the reasons was that he was comfortable with her and that she was different from any other person he'd ever talked to and been with, but still, something didn't quite satisfy me at this falling in love part- and he wasn't much of a romantic person either, so, yeah. But once again, this is a matter of taste. I'm the type of person who would love more romantic-but-not-cliche stuff. The film itself was great, and of course I've stated my favorite part of the movie. :)

Audrey Hepburn as Holly Golightly

Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961)

*this post contains spoilers*

Watched Breakfast at Tiffany's, finally! What I loved so much about the movie was Audrey Hepburn; I completely love her! She has so much class, so much grace, and so much style. The moment the movie began at the scene where the taxi drops her off in front of the Tiffany & Co. store and she begins walking to the window with that famous iconic black dress of hers and then stands in front of the window while eating -what was it, a bagel, a croissant? I forgot what- she already radiated so much elegance and set the bar up and initiated as one of the most elegant fashion icons (if not the most) if Hollywood history. And her hair, oh I love her hair so much in that movie, especially when she wears it up like that. I don't think that the story itself was extraordinary, but there are other things which makes this movie worth watching. I personally wanted to watch this movie because Breakfast at Tiffany's is famous for that Audrey Hepburn scene in front of Tiffany & Co. at the beginning and I wanted to see for myself the classic elegance and style of an actress so well-known, the Audrey Hepburn. I don't know how many times I've said her name already, I just love saying it! There's already such elegance in the name itself, Audrey Hepburn.

Breakfast at Tiffany's is a funny, quirky, romantic story of two people who never dreamed of falling in love for the other. It tells about this quirky, flirtatious girl, Holly Golightly, who lives in an apartment in New York, and she gets a new neighbor, a guy named Paul Varjack. The personalities of the two characters here aren't ones who we can really fall in love to; Holly, this beautiful, stylish, loquacious girl, though 'phony', whose object is to marry man of wealth and grand and who sometimes acts rather silly even though she's apparently smart, and deems herself as a wild thing to beheld and cannot be caged; Paul, a man trying to make a living out of writing, and although he is gentleman-like, open, kind, and considerate, he apparently is also a 'kept' man, the 'other man' of his decorator who is married, in which he is also (it seems) being paid to be one, and is attracted by Holly's quirkiness. After a series of incidents, including the part where he discovers who Holly Golightly truly is, even revealing who she was in the past, and after spending more time together, they fall in love. Holly steps back before the feeling could do more harm to her and pursues another rich man, leaving Paul bewildered and hurt. In the end though, after a particular incident causing a twist and turn in the story, Paul finally talks to her and manages to break down here defense, her 'wildness', and Holly comes after him; hence the happy ending.

It was particularly hard for me to be fond of the Holly Golightly character, her living a phony life and stuff, especially after her true identity is revealed. Nonetheless, I loved Audrey Hepburn's acting, she really lived up the Holly character, and shone throughout the movie. But I did expect the movie to be more romantic, you know. Is Paul Varjack not romantic enough? Hmmm, I just don't think so. This is also, I guess, one of the reasons why I'm not able to fall in love with his character much. He doesn't have that sort of fighting spirit in him, does he? In the end, he kind of makes it up though, you know, those things he said to Holly, I think they really did it, they hit good.

Well, anyways, even though I didn't fall in love with the characters much, I definitely enjoyed the story, the light comedy-romance story, sometimes funny, sometimes sad. In fact, wasn't Audrey Hepburn's act as Holly Golightly, hence Holly Golightly herself, the one that rose Audrey Hepburn's name up so high and made her a classic legendary icon for elegance in fashion and Hollywood? (Kindly inform me if I'm wrong:]) And let me say this again; Audrey Hepburn is enough to be the single reason to watch this movie. It's like the whole package of pluses and the magic is completely in her. I don't know, perhaps I'm being too subjective. Or maybe I need to reinstate; Holly Golightly may not be such a lovely character that we could all fall in love with deeply, but she is something we should love to see as a character, and Hepburn's acting is definitely something everybody should appreciate. Truth is, in later generations in movies, I've seen many characters like this before I saw Breakfast at Tiffany's; the wild one, the one who doesn't want to belong to anything, the one who doesn't want to feel attached, etc etc. But I guess Holly Golightly is one of the originals, eh? And although I don't love her, she definitely sparks.

Audrey Hepburn's Holly Golightly radiates, thus making the film worth watching. :)

"Donnie Darko" (2001): What???

Donnie Darko (2001)

*this post contains spoilers*

AAAAH! Donnie Darko! Hmmm, still can't quite communicate my opinion of this movie! In a way it's a really weird movie, but on the other hand I loved the fact that it was the way it was, you know, just like Gretchen who finds Donnie attractive for his weirdness (but really, watching this movie is exactly like watching the main character Donnie Darko -then again the movie itself is titled Donnie Darko, so it's no wonder it's just as weird and awkward and disturbing as he is, and come to think of it now, this is quite obvious). Anyways..

I absolutely didn't understand the movie until I checked it out on one of the websites I found on the internet that explained everything about it. Another frustrating fact is that this website also hints that to fully understand the whole thing we should best purchase the DVD and watch the DVD commentary, and also, to read the book The Philosophy of Time Travel written by a fictional character from the movie (but in reality written by the director himself), and of course not forgetting the Donnie Darko website, which according to my brother, in order to enter the website we had to crack an extremely difficult puzzle first -isn't that just great? I was really, achingly curious that I was afraid to go to bed last night until I could grasp a little understanding. So I get the plot, right: the "Tangent Universe" thing and it's effect to the world and that Donnie succeeded in bringing back the artifact to the "Primary Universe" thus preventing the end of the world, but it was the 'why' and the 'how' and the 'what' of everything that happened in detail in the chronology that was unclear to me as well as mind-blowing and was honestly frustrating to me, I had to look for answers. But anyways, this website I was talking about, it did help quite a lot.

"Donnie Darko" is directed by Richard Kelly, and stars Jake Gyllenhaal, with his sister Maggie Gyllenhaal, Patrick Swayze, Jena Malone, Drew Barrymore, Mary McDonnell, and Holmes Osborne. The story is about a teenager named Donnie Darko who is "attacked" by these visions of this creepy bunny rabbit person, who tells him that he's got 28 Days left (I forgot the specific details of hours, minutes, and seconds) before the end of the world, and induces him to do a series of crimes. It all begins the night Donnie survives a bizarre accident of a jet engine falling into his room. If he hadn't been sleepwalking that night, he would've been killed.

The version I watched was the Director's Cut out in 2004, so it included some of the excerpts of the chapters of The Philosophy of Time Travel when the previous version did not (imagine how the audience then could possibly have understood the plot without THAT).

Of course one of the reasons why I wanted to watch this movie was because I knew it got high reviews and is rated as one of IMDb's top movies. After watching it, I don't have a problem at all with that, I mean I understand why people give good reviews; because the unique, eery, original plot and screenplay; the successful settings and cinematography (the movie produced in 2001 sets back in October 1988); the creative, thriller, spooky presentation and deliverance of the plot; the outstanding performance by the cast, especially Jake Gyllenhaal's highly appraised performance as the troubled, awkward, rather mentally-disturbed yet intelligent Donnie Darko; the intriguing, mysterious, and various characters that support and contribute to the plot, etc.; I couldn't agree more with all that. I thought it was a really great direction by Richard Kelly and that he delivered a one-of-a-kind, quite never-seen-before original plot, and of course he succeeds in provoking our thoughts and emotions. The problem is the movie was, for me, just too difficult to comprehend without seeking answers on the internet. In fact, I'm starting to wonder whether there is anyone, anybody in this world, who could fully grasp the whole plot at first look without asking questions?

Personally, I'm definitely going to see this movie again. By the end of the movie, all these questions abruptly appeared in my head that I had trouble myself understanding which part I actually wanted to know about first. How come he dies? How come this time the jet engine fell back into his room and he didn't escape while he's seen all that? As explained in one of the chapters, the Manipulated Dead, when they wake up, may bring with them the sensations and feelings in the dreams, so why didn't he try to save himself if he'd seen what was gonna happen? Why was he laughing that night before the jet engine fell into his room? What's this all about, actually? And more of that. But it was all before I read that website that gave me answers (I forgot exactly what website), even though I'm still curious about it, which is why I'm gonna watch it again.

It's because the story isn't explained in the movie, so you must really focus and listen and watch. Like, they're letting us think for ourselves. They're letting us feed from the chronological scenes ourselves and form a so-called hypothesis of our own. And the chapters of the time travel book so little exposed to us don't actually help my understanding much, I must say. Yeah, it's those kind of movies. Remember Inception? Yeah, imagine watching it without all those detailed explanations and descriptions of how inception is done and how you get in a dream and so forth -that's how it would feel like to watch Donnie Darko. Hell, even with all that Inception is still confusing, let alone without it? Yes, fellas, understanding Donnie Darko, to me, was as hard as that.

What I liked about the movie was that it was original, and I've never seen one like this before. Okay, so basically the whole story developed out of the incident of the artifact (jet engine fallen into Donnie's room) that had to be returned into the "Primary Universe", but the whole plot itself, deriving from that, provokes a sense of curiosity and interest in us to watch further into the movie; all that philosophy of time travel thing that Donnie was keen to know about and which he kept asking about to one of his teachers, and how he struggles to relate all this with the facts of his daily life and stuff. At one point it's a really weird, awkward, eery, creepy movie, you know, with all its characters and plots, but at the same time, I must say those stand as its qualities, the qualities that sell, the magic that works.

Can I tell you one other thing I loved about the movie? Jake Gyllenhaal. Yep, I loved his performance as Donnie Darko. I mean, I've heard he's received much critical acclaim for this role, but when I finally got to see it for myself, I really, really, loved it a lot. He totally brings out the dark side and the good side of Donnie Darko..., and he's really cute when he's saying these smart stuff and acting like a somewhat jerk... and that look those eyes give you, I shudder to even think of it (both in a pleasant way and in a creepy way). I especially loved when he talks to Gretchen about the antiseptics thing in that scene where he asks her out. This may be me subjectively speaking, since I'm a huge fan of Jake Gyllenhaal myself, but the critics praise have proven otherwise. This is one of the best performances of him I've yet to see *I haven't seen Brokeback Mountain :(

Cellar door.

That's it for now.

my must see movie list for this month to the next

This is a movie list, excluding those which I've already seen (The Shining, Silence of the Lamb, Pulp Fiction, Good Will Hunting, Dead Poets Society, & The Graduate):

Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961)
My Fair Lady (1964)
Rain Man (1980)
American Beauty (1999)
Citizen Kane (1941)
Mystic River (2003)
Reservoir Dogs (1992)
Requiem for a Dream (2000)
Black Swan (2010)
Before Sunrise (1995)
Before Sunset (2004)
Pan's Labyrinth (2006)
The Princess Bride (1987)
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)
Donnie Darko (2001)
Goodfellas (1990)

Can't wait! Wanna play along? ;)

Good Will Hunting (1997): Reengaging with My Childhood Memory

Good Will Hunting (1997)

*this post contains spoilers*

What else can I say? I loved this movie. This is the typical me movie. It has drama, romance, it was intelligent, gets to you deeply, it inflicts you psychologically, and it makes you cry. This is Good Will Hunting.

This inspiring and beautiful motion picture is directed by Gus Van Sant, starring Matt Damon, Robin Williams, Ben Affleck, Stellan Skarsgard, and Minnie Driver. The story was written by Matt Damon and Ben Affleck themselves!

I've known this movie since I was a kid, and I even got to watch it although I don't remember much about. I remember a student living in our house that time, also a good friend of my parents, his room was this room across ours, and I liked to hang out there a lot, and that time he was watching a movie. Okay, so I'm not sure where exactly he was watching it that time, either it was in a laptop in his room (I'm not certain whether we were able to watch movies on laptops that time) or on the video player in our living room downstairs, but I remember watching it with him and that he always covered my eyes with his hand every time there's a grown-up scene (which made me curious about it). I remember the scenes where Will wrote these mathematical stuff on the chalkboard, the mirror. I remember that girl saying "I think I got your pickle" to him after they kissed while eating burger. But I don't remember much and I don't believe I watched till the movie was over. So now that I've watched the whole movie, I finally know what I've been missing out, really been missing out on, and that I neglected the memory and discontinued it for quite too long (it's been like, 10 years since that time I first saw it). Anyways, I'm being dramatic... -_____-

The film is about a young mathematics genius named Will Hunting (Matt Damon), who also has this ability of strong memory that he can memorize various facts from the books he reads and stuff. He works as a janitor at MIT, and one day he finds this problem written by a mathematician award winning professor named Gerald Lambeau (Stellan Skarsgard) on the chalkboard in the hall for his students to solve. Will observes the problem and easily solves it. Prof. Lambeau discovers that the problem has been solved and wonders who did it, but none of his students admitted it as their work. On the next occasion, Prof. Lambeau writes another problem on the chalkboard (which took him and his colleagues two years to solve) and after a while he catches Will writing on it and chases after him, thinking the janitor was trying to vandalize the board, until he finally notices with astonishment that Will had solved the problem. That's the beginning of everything......

Will gets caught in a fight and is sent to jail but Prof. Lambeau comes to him and explains that he would get released under two conditions, the first is that Will was to work with him with all these mathematical theorems and stuff, and the second is that Will had to attend therapy to improve his mental problems. In comes Robin Williams as the "chosen" psychologist, Sean Maguire, after Lambeau failed with his first five. Sean figures out a way to get the better of his patient, and the two of them gradually form a bond, and discover they relate to each other more than either of them realized.

Will's defense and unwillingness to attach himself with other people comes from the fear of being left ever since his childhood. This fear intervenes again with his relationship Skylar, the girl whom he met at the bar (Minnie Driver), just when Will had begun to yield and their relationship was reaching the point of intimacy. Skylar asks Will to come along with her to California, and this triggers every fear and worry to be unleashed. Will refuses to let her further into his life, for fear of her knowing something that wouldn't please her and make her leave him, but before she could do that, he makes sure that he is the one who leaves her first. This break-up scene was one of the most heartbreaking and tense scenes in the movie, and really sad...

Okay, so I'm not gonna give away the entire plot right now, I'm gonna stop here. :)

Honestly, I was surprised when I watched this movie again that there was a whole lot of swear words and that he turned out to be a troubled young man. I really didn't remember this, and before watching it again I, relying on my memory, took him for a nice, gentle, man. Turns out it was a whole different story.

I don't think I've ever seen Matt Damon play a deeper role. The defensive, troubled kid, with a rough childhood, abused by his foster dad, and growing up he drowned himself with guilt and this self-loathing builds up in him that leads him to feed up to the rather inadequate way of living instead of maximizing the potentials of his brain which could open up to a better way of living. It was hard and intense just to watch him struggle with himself, and I felt for him here, I really felt for him. I swear, sometimes I saw him as a lost little puppy in the rain. Moreover at that scene where he breaks down and cries after Sean repeatedly assures him, "It's not your fault... It's not your fault.." Dang, that made me tear up.

One of my favorite scenes was on their second meeting, when Sean took Will out to sit by the lake and try to get through to him, which was the first step towards breaking that defense down.

Sean: Thought about what you said to me the other day, about my painting. Stayed up half the night thinking about it. Something occurred to me... fell into a deep peaceful sleep, and haven't thought about you since. Do you know what occurred to me?
Will: No.
Sean: You're just a kid, you don't have the faintest idea what you're talkin' about.
Will: Why thank you.
Sean: It's all right. You've never been out of Boston.
Will: Nope.
Sean: So if I asked you about art, you'd probably give me the skinny on every art book ever written. Michelangelo, you know a lot about him. Life's work, political aspirations, him and the pope, sexual orientations, the whole works, right? But I'll bet you can't tell me what it smells like in the Sistine Chapel. You've never actually stood there and looked up at that beautiful ceiling; seen that. If I ask you about women, you'd probably give me a syllabus about your personal favorites. You may have even been laid a few times. But you can't tell me what it feels like to wake up next to a woman and feel truly happy. You're a tough kid. And I'd ask you about war, you'd probably throw Shakespeare at me, right, "once more unto the breach dear friends." But you've never been near one. You've never held your best friend's head in your lap, watch him gasp his last breath looking to you for help. I'd ask you about love, you'd probably quote me a sonnet. But you've never looked at a woman and been totally vulnerable. Known someone that could level you with her eyes, feeling like God put an angel on earth just for you. Who could rescue you from the depths of hell. And you wouldn't know what it's like to be her angel, to have that love for her, be there forever, through anything, through cancer. And you wouldn't know about sleeping sitting up in the hospital room for two months, holding her hand, because the doctors could see in your eyes, that the terms "visiting hours" don't apply to you. You don't know about real loss, 'cause it only occurs when you've loved something more than you love yourself. And I doubt you've ever dared to love anybody that much. And look at you... I don't see an intelligent, confident man... I see a cocky, scared shitless kid. But you're a genius Will. No one denies that. No one could possibly understand the depths of you. But you presume to know everything about me because you saw a painting of mine, and you ripped my fucking life apart. You're an orphan right?
[Will nods]
Sean: You think I know the first thing about how hard your life has been, how you feel, who you are, because I read Oliver Twist? Does that encapsulate you? Personally... I don't give a shit about all that, because you know what, I can't learn anything from you, I can't read in some fuckin' book. Unless you want to talk about you, who you are. Then I'm fascinated. I'm in. But you don't want to do that do you sport? You're terrified of what you might say. Your move, chief.

I loved it. I completely felt it.

I love everything about the movie! It's a beautiful movie with a great cast and great characters, and an intelligently written screenplay, and a wonderful direction by Gus Van Sant. To think that the writers of the film itself were Matt Damon and Ben Affleck! Wow, I honestly never expected this. I mean, who would expect two very good-looking young actors to be able to write a remarkable story like this? At least, I know I didn't. It's not a typical, and it's just fantastic. This movie made me laugh, giggle, cry, contemplate, and love it.

I loved every character in the movie, including even Will's best buddies, especially Ben Affleck starring as Will's best friend, Chuckie Sullivan, and most especially his part in the scene where he talks about the future with Will, and that he wanted a better future for him, and then points the fact where the happiest moment of his days were those between when he walks out of his car to Will's front door, and knocking on it only to find that Will had left the neighborhood at last.

I guess there's nothing more to say about Robin Williams' role in this movie. He portrays his role with as much depth and dedication as usual.

I only wish it didn't end so fast, and that at least they got to how Will made things up again with Skylar (but hey, that's just my own self-indulgence).

(IF YOU HAVEN'T) YOU GOTTA SEE GOOD WILL HUNTING!

Pulp Fiction (1994): A Refreshment!

Pulp Fiction (1994)

I've been curious about this movie for a long time. A film by the very one and only Quentin Tarantino, it stars a variety of A-list actors which I believe at that time were already A-listers, or were beginning to be; John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Bruce Willis, Uma Thurman, including Christopher Walken and the appearance of Quentin Tarantino himself.

Having seen Kill Bill and Inglourious Basterds prior to this movie, Pulp Fiction is the underliner that confirms my thoughts of having him as one of my favorite filmmakers of all time, and one whose works from now on I'll always anticipate. But, before you read further into this, please understand that you're reading from a nineteen year old not so knowledgeable of the filming industry and that I'm reviewing this based on my personal taste only, for the sake that I should blog as much as I can, and the sake of sharing information if one were still blind to it, so..., I humbly ask that you, if you happened to be a pro, not torment me with your more advanced skill of criticizing by abusing my innocent perceptions. :D (What a lengthy excuse? Wrote it simply for the sake of writing the words down than having the importance of it delivered. Just love composing words. Hehe) Pardon me.

The movie tells about a series of events involving separate stories of the characters, that intermingle and affect one another. The tales include that of the two hit men of Marcellus Wallace (the boss gangster, it seems) named Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson) and Vincent Vega (John Travolta) who is sent by Wallace to retrieve a stolen case; Butch, a boxer (Bruce Willis) who is aging and is requested to lose in a match; Mia Wallace (Uma Thurman), wife of Marcellus; and a couple attempting to rob a restaurant.

I have to say the lengthy conversations were what kept me intrigued. Yeah, like ever since I watched Inglourious Basterds I noticed that Quentin Tarantino loved exploiting to the audience these long conversations between characters, that maybe they've become a trademark to his style of film-making. But they weren't those boring, pointless, talks that would usually have made me fallen asleep or turn off the film whatsoever. In Pulp Fiction, these conversations kept the movie interesting to me, in which I really enjoyed them. The varied topics to the varied manners of talking, choice of words; all were fresh, witty, amusing, clever, even unpredictable, and defined the main characters well, and they truly stand as a refreshment to me in my late history of watching movies.

The series of events following the clashes of the tales of the characters is one of the things that own to the title: Pulp Fiction, as in, well, plainly supposed to be rather fictive and thus irrelevant to what we consider our daily lives. They were crazy and unpredictable, you could never expect what would happen next. One moment it's like this and the next moment it's like, boom! Like, "What just happened there?!"

And there's just something comical -well I wouldn't say comical, but kinda something like a laughable way that these scenes are presented, whether it's in the essence, the order of the scenes, the cinematography, and such and such.

I believed there wasn't an exact point of what the movie was about, you might even be asking in the end, "So..., what's the point?" I mean, I was like, "Just like that?" with a satisfied laugh, but it doesn't mean it was pointless. If you're seeking a story with a perfect beginning, a middle, and an end, you obviously wouldn't find that in this one, but in fact, this is what makes it so good, and so refreshing :D that it's simply a string of events tied together, really unpredictable, exciting, out-of-the-box, one that doesn't follow the traditional rules, series of events. Okay so probably, in storyline, it didn't have a main point, but in watching the movie itself, the point was that it was a very good movie with an intelligently written screenplay and amusing series of events. It wasn't built to be a comedy, let alone set be entertaining like how a comedy should be, seeing how it magnifies the violent criminal life, but in a sense of a movie as a work presented to the audience, with all the unpredictable turns and twists and light dialogues, it is definitely an entertaining piece to witness and absolutely refreshing. I had my laughs and wonders watching this movie. I also heard many interesting quotes throughout the movie that caught my attention. You know, the quotes / dialogues that refer to you and deliver your point. Yeah, I heard many of those.

All the actors showed a really great performance.

For the first time, I think I saw Samuel L. Jackson play a role that really showed character. He was Jules Winfield. I never saw him in a role that suited him more than this, or one that I could like more than this. And this was way back in 1994.

I guess this is all I can think of to say about this movie so far. If hearts had a language of their own, they'd probably have a better way of literally expressing what I felt about the movie, but for now, guess I just gotta count on this post here.

G'bye!

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

*this post contains spoilers*

So, a few days ago I watched The Silence of the Lambs, a film produced right in the year where I was born, with my brother. Had wanted to write a post about it right after, but didn't. The review I have of this movie is simply based on my personal views; what struck me, what impressed me, what dissatisfied me, since I'm not a critic and all, and all I have to say is according to my own taste and pleasure, therefore this review is merely a subjective idea I have of it, that you don't need to rely on it if you like.

Directed by Jonathan Demme, The Silence of the Lambs stars the great Anthony Hopkins and Jodie Foster. Clarice Starling (Jodie Foster) was sent by her boss to inquire Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins) about some facts which can help lead to the capture of a serial killer, one who murders his lady victims and skins them.

First of all, you have to know that I was expecting a lot from this movie at first. I mean, I didn't know that the story was supposed to be this way. I thought the major focus of the story was of that of Hannibal Lecter the cannibal, of his life, of his crimes, etc. Hence, I was hoping a lot more action and drama from his side of the story. I understand that the storyline focuses on him in a way that he appears as a mysterious suspenseful sideline thriller and by this he plays as the 'firecracker' of the film, but honestly, I expected him to be the main object of the whole story..., like, it's the notorious Hannibal Lector we're talking about here, the cannibal. I hated to see them take away that focus and then aim it to Buffalo Bill. The cannibal was supposed to be the star, even if you deem he was already.

I mean, I was expecting to know the whole story of his case, how he started feeding on human flesh, who his victims were, how he got caught, the history of his life, his life as a renowned psychiatrist -weren't you wondering about it too? Anyways, this dissatisfaction came from my wrong expectations so, let's set aside the part where Lecter's case should be the case of the whole movie and see it from a point of view of a viewer who had no expectations at all for the film.

Alright, so Lecter is literally a maneater. He eats humans. He's been caught, and now agent Starling comes to him. And ever since the beginning, Hopkins portrayed Lecter perfectly as to create this calm, creepy, menacing of air that injects interest to the story, inviting curiosity, forcing us in to trail along with Starling's correspondence with him and the steps of discovering Buffalo Bill. It was obvious that everybody saw him as a monster, but a much notoriously famous and prized one, for he ate humans, and was once a well-known psychiatrist himself. Everybody was careful to keep their distance, one slightly wrong move near him and he might literally bite off your face. What intriguing...

Okay, I'm gonna give you a little spoiler too, if you haven't seen the movie. I believe the peak of the movie for me was when Lecter escaped and fed off the two polices. I was like, finally, some Lecter action! It was horrid, creepy, terrifying, nightmarish, the scariest thing ever to see him bite off their faces like that. As I said before, he was after all the firecracker of the movie, the one that made the movie worth watching, and with such calmness and coldness of that attitude, and such civility of manners and tone of speaking... Hopkins succeeded a great deal in creating one of the most feared notorious characters ever alive on screen. According to my brother, Hopkins won an Oscar for his portrayal as Hannibal Lecter, which I couldn't agree more on. But Lecter escaped and that was it, no more of him (if I'm not mistaken?).

The film itself was basically already creepy. A serial killer who kills young ladies and skins them? And all those horrid photos of the victims. And all that blood. And other similar sadistic scenes I was unwilling to see, hehe.

Here's what I don't get though. The title, "The Silence of the Lambs". Okay, so not long after Starling killed the serial killer and rescued the daughter of the senator (oops, sorry), she got a phone call from Lecter right, and he assumed that the cry of the lambs that she'd been hearing had now been silent because she managed to seal the case and save the girl. Yes, she had been talking about the lambs before, before Lecter escaped. Somehow, I just still don't get it. You know, I don't get whether there's still a strong connection of the title with the film hidden somewhere, or it's just simply that. Anyways.

Jodie Foster's role here didn't divert far from her roles later on in the future in Panic Room and Inside Man. Even though they weren't similar, she was the typical clever, tough one. But still, she portrayed her role strongly here.

What's still unclear to me is how in detail they got that address of Buffalo Bill in that town I forgot and which turned out to be fake. Probably wasn't paying attention that much, hehe (?) and the rest flowed on pretty easily, except the part where Lecter appears again and calls Starling.

Overall, I think it is THE MOVIE TO WATCH, and it is a real HORROR, if only I didn't have expectations of an alternate story in the first place.

Finally Watched "The Shining"

The Shining (1980)

I just watched The Shining with my brother tonight. Been wanting to watch it for a looong time. And what a CLASSIC HORROR it is.

The Shining (1980) is a film directed by Stanley Kubrick, starring Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall, and Danny Lloyd. It is based on the book by Stephen King.

The story goes like this. So, there's a hotel right, it's called Overlook Hotel and it's located in the mountains. Winter's coming, and Jack Torrance attends an interview to take in the job as the caretaker for the winter. Every winter, they empty the hotel. Yes, they completely empty the hotel until nobody is left, not even the administration, the management, not the cooks, or janitors, and this only happens when winter comes. It so happens that back in 1970, a caretaker who goes by the name Grady killed his wife and two daughters violently with an axe, before finally murdering himself, while looking after the hotel.

So, Jack Torrance stays in the hotel during winter with his wife, Wendy, and son, Danny. Jack intended to use the isolation as a time for him to work on his writing peacefully. And thus, the horror begins. The evil presence starts to influence Jack in doing bad things driving him insane, and Danny keeps having these visions from the past and the future. Well of course, I won't give any spoilers, I'm not gonna tell you what "The Shining" actually is. I'm not gonna say anything about the ending either... Let's just say, it was worth the watch, and yes, it was intense and suspenseful.

I'm not a good reviewer for movies in detail, but I can comment on some stuff that stuck in my head till the end of the movie.

First of all, the original score helped a lot in creating the horror ambiance to the movie. I mean, the instrumental score itself was completely scary. Typical classic movies, I guess?

And then, the sudden flashing images of... you know, the "scary stuff". Geez, I got goosebumps by just writing this. Honestly, I thought the suspense belonged mostly to the part of the kid's scenes, where he has these visions, and shows these horrified expressions, with the lingering looks and lengthy pointless scenes of him riding his small toy and looking into the corridor and things like that. They were completely horrifying.

Jack Nicholson was so perfect for this role. He gives me the creeps just by raising those eyebrows of his. But it was like nothing I had never seen in his roles before. I mean, he was as usual acting like THE Jack Nicholson, there was not an expression I was unfamiliar with from his face. Except, for the first time, I saw a younger version of him. He was extremely creepy when he started going insane.

I remember seeing The Simpsons parody of The Shining, and that made me want to watch the movie even more. Now that I've seen it, and got the story, I'd like to see that episode again. Haha.

I gotta apologize, I've never spoken about a horror movie before, so I don't exactly know the right choice of words, hehe. I normally avoid these typical films, but The Shining is a classic. The Shining, I just GOTTA watch.

For the moment, that's all I feel like saying about this movie. It's the middle of the night, and it's creepy. Although I definitely recommend you to watch The Shining.

Food & Me

I love to cook. I have this passion in me that just loves to mix these ingredients and watch it become something amazing called food. A cuisine. Hehe. But not only that. I'm into photography also and I love to photograph them every time I'm done cooking. Since I'm still new at this, let's say amateur, I like to show off what I've accomplished to other people, hehe, yeah I love to upload the pictures on my blog, tumblr, and facebook, and sometimes twitter (if the previous three aren't enough, haha). Yes, I love to cook, and I love food. I'm always excited when I'm about to cook. Always determined to make a great meal...and great photographs. :)

 

So last night I cooked Fettuccine Carbonara, and I loved it! Haha, I know, how can I be the one who says it's good when it's meant for the whole family, right? Well, yeah, I'm sort of a narcissist when it comes to cooking. But believe me, when I say it's good, it's good! I'm actually also objective towards my own cooking. Truth is, my family also loved my fettuccine, so... :D

Now I'm gonna explain how I made this Fettuccine Carbonara. I didn't exactly follow a particular recipe, just chose random recipes from the internet, studied them, and came up with a way to cook my own, you know, by taking a little bit of this and that..., and doing a little bit of my own so-called improvisations.

So, what we need is: smoke beef, champignon mushroom, cheddar cheese, full cream milk, olive oil, garlic, egg yolks, black pepper, and a bit of salt.

First of all, while boiling the pasta, I just fried the little pieces of smoke beef, garlic, and mushroom, and then added dashes of olive oil. Then, I beat the egg yolks in a bowl, and added around 400 ml of milk [should've added more milk, the fettuccine was a bit dry, but anyways :D], stirred the sauce mixture, and added them to the frying pan. And then I added black pepper, and cheese. Finally, I added the pasta and stirred them altogether. Hehe *blush*

I apologize, if you're a professional, the way I cooked this may seem very, very.... amateur and well, how else can you say it, unprofessional, but that is simply the truth, that I am just an amateur and I don't know that much about cooking yet. And mine probably had too much fat in it, haha, but for starters, I'm happy with the result. :)

The night before I did this one, I actually made it with some friends. It was also good, but somehow I was sort of unsatisfied, first of all because we didn't use mushrooms, and then there was no olive oil, and no egg yolks, and I couldn't have it my way because there were three of us.

So, I made it again at home. I had my camera with me (but safely put away while cooking) all the time.

The previous night I was wondering what the egg yolks were for. And now I know what the egg yolks do to the sauce, hehe. To know what I mean, you gotta try it yourself too.

This is my latest creation. Haven't cooked anything else ever since. Well, it's been only a day, you see, and we've spent the day trying to finish up the fettuccine because it turns out 500 gr of pasta is a lot of pasta, so, yeah, we needed time to finish it. But it's finished now, so nothing went to waste. :)

 

So, that was fettuccine.

I started to cook quite often ever since I went to college. Sometimes, I feel like other people don't get the "feel" I feel when cooking, you know? Sometimes, to them, it's important to just get the food done already. Sometimes it's important to just have the food. But it's not. It's important that you take your time and enjoy every second of it, it's important that you pay attention to the details, keep it neat and beautiful, that when you serve it, it's a delightful and beautiful thing to see. Sometimes, budget doesn't matter, as long as it's all worth it in the end. The satisfaction, the joy of cooking your own meal, cooking for the family. And of course, the happiness when other people are delighted and love your cooking. Finally, it's creating wonderful mouthwatering photographs of them. Well, basically out of all this talk about passion and stuff, I'm just trying to point out that besides taste, appearance also matters.

After a while, you learn from your mistakes and improve them. My most recent Ayam Kecap is a lot better than my first ever Ayam Kecap. Eventually, the skill develops in you and you get used to it. The next time you cook, you know what to do. It's not just about this Ayam Kecap. I mean, like when you've cooked often, the ingredients and stuff become things you're used to, and afterwards you kinda just follow your intuition. Of course what I mean, is after the first time of everything.

   

I study recipes, but I never actually follow precisely one recipe. I only need to know what I must do, and how I have to do it, and know the cautions if there are any, and then I go on my way. I don't follow them from A to Z. They're like big inspirations for me, hehe. I was so excited when I made my first ever Calamari. Haha. It didn't taste bad either. Learned how to clean the squid thoroughly, studied recipes to know what I needed, and then cooked it according to my own previous analysis, haha [because sometimes I only need the recipes to confirm my so-called analysis] :D

 

Obviously, you need your mother. Haha, she'll definitely pass on some great recipes that you can follow. My mom taught me how to cook these buttered prawns. It turned out to be really easy too. And how I loved the smell when I fried those prawns with the butter. You see, you always wanna try something new, something in a different level, once you've started to love cooking and done one thing. Who would ever thought that I would ever make buttered prawns? The past me would never have imagined. And now I've cooked fettuccine, which is actually very easy to make. :)

 

Salmon was expensive, but I loved it, so I dared to try cook it anyway. Read some recipes, yeah, but as usual didn't end up following the whole instructions. And that time, I only used mayonnaise for the sauce. Haha, tried to look up how to make a sauce out of it instead of it, but couldn't find one that I could understand, so... But the salmon itself was already good, I mean, salmon is basically just so good, right?

 

So, that's all for now about food and me. I love to cook and take pictures of them and show them to people. I guess, what inspired me big time, one of them, was Tumblr. Yeah, I started tumblring on February 2010 and I've seen so many mouthwatering pictures of food that triggered me to soon create some of myself and make people hungry by seeing it.

I'll remind you again, I'm an amateur cook who's just begun to learn cooking and I'm just really excited in this that I want people to know that I'm excited, haha. I'm just really passionate about this, more passionate than I am about my major, which is architecture.

If there was a prestigious culinary school in Indonesia, I'd definitely go there. I'd absolutely choose to major in culinary [if there is such] or whatever subdivisions they have for this kind of art. I love to cook! But now, I gotta be satisfied with my architecture major. It's not so bad either, I've begun to like it too. In fact, I have a new dream, and that, is becoming a world-renowned architect. Amen.

That's all for now! :)